Do you have a list of projects on your mind at all times? There’s the self-initiated ones that just never seem to get done. The unwanted-yet-necessary ones that pop up unexpectedly. The pipe-dream projects that only live in your head and the should-do’s that hang over it. It can feel overwhelming. It’s easy to let these seemingly endless tasks take over all your free time and energy.
Luckily, there are ways to feel more balance and less stress when it comes to those “projects”.
First, take the pressure off yourself. It’s likely you’ve got many other things on your plate, so completing all the extra projects simply isn’t realistic. Prioritize the ones that must get done, and give yourself some grace with the others.
Second, put more thought and intention into which projects actually make it onto your list. Your time and energy are valuable commodities; are you investing them in things that are worth it? Are you balancing out the not-so-fun tasks with projects that bring you joy, strengthen your connection, or help you grow as a couple? If you haven’t given much thought to this, then we can help you get started. Here are five types of projects to take on together:
- The self-discovery project
Learning more about yourselves – together – is a great way to gain insight into what makes each of you tick and how that plays into the unique dynamics of your relationship. Consider taking personality or relationship assessments or even digging into your family histories. Plan date nights where you can do research together or discuss your results and findings. Make it an ongoing thing, a point of connection that you can keep coming back to. After all, you’re constantly growing and changing as individuals and as a couple; this is a great way to continue getting to know each other, even if you’ve been together for years.
- The DIY project
This one might be pretty similar to some of the projects already filling your list, but there actually is value that can come out of tackling a DIY project together. It requires you to communicate and work as a team, and you might even gain knowledge about something you knew nothing about before! Whether you build, repair, or upgrade something around your home or even just successfully assemble a piece of IKEA furniture, you and your spouse will walk away with a sense of accomplishment and confidence to take on more together. And here’s a hot tip: Before you get started, agree on a lighthearted way to handle frustration should it pop up, like using a silly code word to take a break.
- The financial project
Every couple has a different orientation around money, but chances are there is something “bigger” you’re working towards. Saving up for a special purchase, learning about investing, setting up college funds for your kids (or even teaching them about money), getting out of debt, or creating a budget you stick to are just some of the examples of money-related projects that you and your spouse could consider working on together. Not only can it help you get on the same page if this is a contentious area, you’ll hopefully experience long-term financial benefits as well.
- The just-for-fun project
Break out the 1000-piece puzzle, put together a time capsule to open on a future anniversary, digitize all your physical photos, or finally print those digital ones. This type of project is just what it sounds like. It something that is not only enjoyable to do together, but also creates the opportunity for great conversation, connection, and creating shared meaning. You might even find a new shared hobby or interest that opens up a whole new world of ways to spend quality time together.
- The legacy project
If you have children, have you put much thought into the memories, traditions, or values you want to pass down or instill in them? Take some time talk about this with your spouse, then think about how you can translate one of those things into a project you can work on together. It could be creating photo or scrapbooks for your kids as they grow, or even of your own lives to share with them down the road. Maybe you put intention into creating a unique family tradition or planning a way to incorporate your family heritage into holiday and birthday celebrations. Whatever you choose, it can be a bonding experience that pays off for years to come.
Projects don’t have to be a chore. While you can’t avoid all of the not-so-fun ones, you can be more picky about which other ones you put your time and energy into. When chosen carefully, projects can be fun, meaningful, and good for your relationship, too.
5 Projects to Take On Together